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October 23, 2024Patience and the Art of Waiting
"The two most powerful warriors are patience and time" Leo Tolstoy
Bach Flowers for Patience - The late Louise Hay said, “Patience is being at peace with the process of life” and I have been reflecting on these wise words during a recent health crisis when a sudden diagnosis left me without the ability to control my life in the way I would wish and when the care and attention of others became necessary.
The Bach Flower Remedy Impatiens relates to the soul qualities of patience and gentleness. The Impatiens state leads to inner tension due to nervous frustration because things don’t move fast enough. In this state we find it hard to wait for things to take their course.
Waiting, the action of staying where one is or delaying action until a particular time or event, is something we all do but our reactions to it vary. We may find waiting frustrating and stressful, becoming restless, irritable and impatient. Irritated that whatever outcome we want is not brought about in a timely manner, we may doubt others’ intentions, ability and power to help us.
To cultivate patience, it is helpful to develop a clear understanding of our thoughts and emotions. For me stillness is key to receiving clear and accurate guidance and I do this best when walking in nature. As Lao Tzu reminds us “Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”
By actively engaging with the present moment we mindfully meet our thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations with curiosity and acceptance. What I noticed were feelings of fear, discouragement and hopelessness and also some resentment at having to put plans on hold for an indefinite period of time.
As always in times of stress I sought support from Bach Flower Remedies including Aspen and Mimulus to bring courage to face my health challenge with equanimity and grace. Gentian eased my early discouragement and despondency during setbacks and Gorse allowed me to nurture trust, faith and hope from within. Willow, for resentment, brought optimism and faith and allowed me to gain perspective.
Moments of waiting are opportunities for self-reflection. Exploring the underlying causes of our impatience, restlessness, resistance and desire for things to be different brings insight and a willingness to accept things as they are.
The action of taking the Remedies on a regular basis has supported my fluctuating emotions and allowed me to become less reactive, to let go of my attachment to the outcome. What I noticed is that I was seeking to manage the situation all by myself and I recognise this as one of my patterns. Not for the first time has it been necessary to bring self-compassion and a deep sense of acceptance and serenity to the waiting process.
As a student of A Course in Miracles my spiritual practice has been invaluable. “Patience is natural to those who trust” (Manual for Teachers VIII Patience). True patience is waiting without any anxiety whatsoever. “Those who are certain of the outcome can afford to wait and wait without anxiety.”
I realised that trusting in my own strength rather than following the guidance of Lesson 47 “God is the strength in which I trust” created unnecessary fear and anxiety. In truth we cannot do anything by ourselves, and our belief that we can comes from our perception of ourselves as alone and separate so that we trust in our limited self instead.
Patience is rooted in certainty as Lesson 292 reminds us “A happy outcome to all things is sure”. Facing a health challenge is a call for love to guide and support me in divine right timing, remembering that “God goes with me wherever I go” (Lesson 41)
The Buddhist perspective is that waiting is an opportunity for growth and the development of wisdom. It reminds us to live in a state of allowing and to recognise the impermanence of all things, including waiting. Remember - this too shall pass.
“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting” Joyce Meyer
Points of Reference
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Bach Flower Remedies and their uses
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