The Course in Miracles says that “all disease comes from a state of unforgiveness” and that “whenever we are ill we need to look around to see who it is that we need to forgive”. Louise Hay states that the very person you find it hardest to forgive is the one you need to let go of the most. Forgiving means giving up, letting go, but has nothing to do with condoning behaviour. All we need to do is be willing to forgive and let the universe take care of the how.
One of the first steps on the path of healing is the deepening of forgiveness. Indeed, after awareness has brought us to the path of healing, it is forgiveness that softens the path and allows continued progress. Learning not to judge events and situations is a great part of healing and forgiveness.
When we do not flow freely with life in the present moment it usually means we are holding on to a past moment. It can be regret, sadness, hurt, fear, guilt, blame, anger, resentment and sometimes even the desire for revenge. Each state comes from a space of unforgiveness, a refusal to let go and come into the present moment. But by forgiving others we obtain forgiveness for ourselves. Self-forgiveness, in turn, frees us to finally live without guilt and fear. Forgiving ourselves is often more difficult than forgiving others. “Forgive us as we forgive others” is thus a powerful healing principle.
Personal Reflections on the state of Forgiveness
Surprisingly little is written about the concept of betrayal and there being no clear definition of the word it is more effectively understood through literature. An act of betrayal brings about a raft of negative behaviours with victims exhibiting anger and confusion and demanding atonement from the perpetrator. If this is not forthcoming a state of dis-ease may ensue.
However, betrayal becomes nothing when we get down to what really matters to our eternal self: knowing our eternality and its state of perfect love. It is possible to find that place of knowing during times of meditation, contemplation, processing or working with crystals. From a perspective of non-duality no one betrayed anyone. If some part of me holds on to anger and blame, feeling like a victim, and I perceive that something was done to me, this is not a clear understanding of how things work. The highest truth is that there is no one doing anything to anyone. There is no separation between each of us and the true self. Still when a betrayal happens to us personally and we are still in the system of separation, it feels very real.
The third chakra is located in the centre of the body in the Solar Plexus. This chakra governs the sphere of self-direction, personal will and intention, physical energy and self-control. It affects our self-esteem and how we feel about ourselves. It affects our ability to accept responsibility for ourselves and assume personal authority over our lives. It is the centre for our personal expression of power.
The fourth chakra is located near the heart in the centre of the chest. This centre, when awakened and balanced, governs our feelings of compassion, forgiveness, understanding, generosity, empathy, caring and love. On an energy level it connects the lower ego or physical self to the higher soul or spiritual self. The fourth chakra, our spiritual heart centre, is the most important centre in our psychic make-up. This is because love is the greatest power in our lives and the highest channel of life force available to us.
When we take on and assume a polarised position associated with power issues in the third chakra a knot in the diaphragm develops and becomes stronger, and when we recognise these polarities and forgive them, the knot opens up allowing our awareness to ascend into the heart. Forgiveness releases the idea of betrayal held in the mind, and the contraction betrayal creates in the physical body leaves. It also releases the associated emotional content.
Forgiveness is an amazing energy field. It is a profound letting go, expansion, and embracing of peace in the heart. Another word for forgiveness is reconciliation which implies the harmonious coming together of previously disparate and conflicting forces. Thus, forgiveness or reconciliation is the ascended state that is kindled in the heart chakra when we reconcile the polarity of betrayal and trust in the third chakra.
Forgiveness takes a lot of faith. Often it is an intuitive flash that tells us that not forgiving, but holding vengeful, hateful thoughts, is actually more damaging to our own system. It may affect the person we are projecting our thoughts onto, but in the end it will hurt us more. So, forgiveness is the willingness to let go – of our self-importance, our pride, our hurt, and our resentment. As Shakespeare said, “To err is human, to forgive divine”. Learning to forgive is the very real awakening of our divine nature.
Forgiveness is the mystical union of two opposing energy forces. It allows them to dissolve, and then they naturally come together, unify and ascend into the heart. Forgiveness has to happen on every level. It is important to let go of the way in which we have told ourselves the story. We created the story and we can heal it and let it go. We are not the victims of circumstance, we are the creators too. But until we accept that, we are powerless in the face of dominance from the outside that wounds us. It takes an incredible generosity of spirit to do this and that is why it is a spiritual state to forgive.
If emotional wounding closes the heart, forgiveness opens it. The only way to achieve the blessings of love is to be willing to let go and forgive. In forgiveness we end the separations that cause us to feel unlovable and hurt. We reclaim the truth that no one can keep us from feeling love and being loved. Forgiveness takes another look at our history with a compassionate eye. It frees us from our past, honours our lessons, and gives us the opportunity to become the healer rather than the wounded one.
Every time you open your heart with compassion the love emanating from you grants someone else grace.